resistance

Posted by julie on October 03, 19100 at 09:14:06:

In Reply to: Resistence to practice posted by velique on October 02, 19100 at 20:31:16:

how funny that you are having a similar problem to me...ever since i finished my first gong, i've had periods where i didn't practice...i WANT to stick with it, but am going through a period where i have a hard time concentrating at all, and have a very hard time motivating myself to do the form. it's funny...i'd been meaning to post about this and ask for chi. even though my own progress is hard to see, i really want to stick with this because this is something that I can do for myself. but, like you, it's a struggle.

it seems that with all the physical exhaustion you have to deal with with cfs, it's natural that you may get so tired mentally as to lose some motivation too. it's certainly not that you're just lazy, but you know that. all you can do is just struggle through and know that things will change.

much chi to you, velique...

julie :)

: Dear Friends,

: I am having a struggle that I thought someone might be able to shed some light on. This may go on a bit...bear with me!

: I recently committed to doing more chi lel. At the same time I read the description of lcupcd in Dr. Pang's book. That deepened my practice to the point where it was almost not even the same form. (I had learned from the video and never used the audios.)

: The first few days of doing if according to Dr. Pang's directions (the details being in the visualization) I had such wonderful and deep chi experiences. The third day I had a chi reaction that sent be staggering to bed. I know it was a chi reaction...I felt the chi "hit" the problem.

: Now, all this seems good, yes? But I am finding it harder and harder to "make" myself do the practice. It was easier when it was more superfical. I struggle with myself every day. In fact, the struggle itself is exhausting.

: I feel I am at a pivotal point, and I don't understand the resistence. This seems like what i have wanted for so long...this deep experience. Am I afraid of going through the reactions? Am I afraid of getting well? Am I just lazy?

: I feel this is something deep...but I don't know how to access it.

: Thanks for listening! Any ideas welcomed.

: ~^^V^^~

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